You probably remember part 2, when you were about to invade Russia. You gather 650 000 men, and the war begins. The Russians don’t want to fight you, so they start running. They had a plan, and that plan was to wreck the environment. One of your tactics was to live off the environment. This meant that you needed supply trains. And another thing that you used was speed, and with supply trains you can’t have any speed. You keep going deeper and deeper into Russian territory. You have about 130 000 men, and you have made it to Moscow. The Russians stopped retreating and came to fight. DiD tHEy WiN? No, but they burned Moscow down, so again, you can’t get anything. You now send a letter to Alexander, asking him to surrender. Here’s a conversation between Alexander and one of his men.
“Your majesty, Napoleon sent a letter asking us to surrender. What shall I respond?”
“You won’t respond, ever.”
“Ever? But Napoleon is stuck 500 miles in Russian territory, and it’s about to be winter soon. If we don’t say anything... well, then they’ll all die, ohh!”
So, winter came, and as soon as you saw the first drop of snow, you began to panic. The beginning of the end is near. You need to get back to French territory ASAP (before we continue, I need to tell you that you were carrying a bottle of poison, which will be important later).
When the Russian forces saw that you began retreating, they immediately attacked, but you were able to get out. This is horrible, because you have very few men, and then Austria declared neutrality, while Prussia and Sweden declared war. The British still threw money at your enemies. This looked terrible for you. The Russians quickly gained a ton of land, and your enemies have gotten stronger. Their armies quickly made it to Poland and Germany. You were… well, stressed.
You gathered 100 000 men, but you were lacking horses and you needed speed, which required horses. You still managed to defeat them, but you couldn’t demolish them and win. You also began having chaos with the Austrians, so they declared war… again… Did they have a chance? Yes, absolutely, they did. They made a plane of wherever you went, they would avoid battle and attack the French marshals guarding your flanks. Did this work? Yes… very well. They won a lot of battles, and you had to retreat to the city of Leipzig. They also won that battle.
Now, what was going on in Spain? Ah, of course, chaos. You’ve been losing territory there as well, and British troops began attacking France. Austrian armies attacked Italy, and literally everyone who you controlled or helped turned against you. So now you’re defending France, and the allies wanted to get rid of you for an unknown reason. But it’s not over. You’re still defending, and you haven’t lost, but the enemy forces attacked from two sides, and you can’t be at two places at once, meaning they got closer and closer to Paris.
And Paris fell. So, they decided that King Louis XVIII. would rule France, and they exiled you to Elba, where you could rule an island. When you heard the news, you drank the poison, but it didn’t work, because it had gone out of date. Everything was great, though. You were promised to get money from France, and you made the island great, but you were sad, because your first wife died, and King Louis XVIII. didn’t give you a penny, and there were rumours about an assassination.
However, you somehow got back to France to reclaim your throne. However, King Louis XVIII. sent some troops to arrest you, but the troops were mostly your old friends, and they didn’t have the heart to arrest you. So, you are emperor of France, and that’s where I would end the part, but we are nearly at the end.
You promised the allies that you will not start any more wars, but they didn’t believe you, and you lost again. Here’s how you did that. The allies declared war on you. No, not France, but you as an individual. Your plan was to destroy the armies in the north, and then you probably wouldn’t lose. However, you were outnumbered. You are up against the Prussians and the British. You demolished the Prussians, but they managed to retreat. However, instead of going east (to Germany) they went north, to keep contact with the British, and they won.
So, what’s your fate now? Well, the allies sent you to Saint Helena, an extremely isolated island. If you want to escape from here, then I wish you luck, because there were 2 000 British troops there, and two British ships guarding the island. You passed away at the age of 51 of stomach cancer.
The End
Papp Mátyás V. B
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